joshua's birth story: part three

Click here to read Part One and Part Two.

Again, if reading a birth story isn't your jam, here's a video to watch instead.

“9 pounds, 14 ounces! You’re a legend!” I remember hearing Brett exclaim after the nurses weighed Joshua, except I wasn’t paying much attention. I was SO tired I could hardly keep my eyes open. But I can’t fall asleep now! The hard part is just beginning! There’s a BABY I have to take care of now!

One of the nurses asked me how I felt, and I think I remember saying “I’m really tired… and I kind of feel like I’m going to throw up again.” Now, I REALLY couldn’t keep my eyes open, and everything started to feel very far away.

At this point, Brett started to get concerned. I was apparently VERY pale, almost green. He tried to keep my attention by asking me questions, but I hardly had the energy to respond.

I guess my blood pressure started to crash (again, I can’t remember the numbers but it was LOW) so the nurses sprung into action. I was pretty “out of it” here, so forgive me for the lack of details. I know I was given a shot of Ephedrin to keep my blood pressure up. (How ironic, considering all day we were trying to keep it from getting too high.) After awhile, I started to feel a little better, so I asked to hold Joshua. I wanted to nurse as soon as possible, and it had already been about an hour since he was born. They raised the head of my bed, propped me up on some pillows, and handed me that sweet baby boy I had worked so hard for. He was beautiful.

Unfortunately, I started to feel very woozy once again; I was pretty sure I was about to faint. Or throw up. Or both. Joshua was whisked away so they could focus on me for awhile. I remember hearing one of the nurses say they were taking him to the nursery for the night… I so badly wanted him to stay with me, but I wasn’t able to get the words out. And, of course in hind sight, I realize I was in absolutely no position to care for him.

I ended up getting one or two more shots of Ephedrin and I was put on oxygen for the night. They told me to get some sleep, but with the high level of anxiety in my body, the blood pressure cuff going off every few minutes, and multiple visits from the nurses, it was not easy.

The next morning around 6am, I asked Brett to go see Joshua in the nursery. I was still flat on my back and on oxygen so I wasn’t sure if we could have him in the room, but I at least wanted one of us near him. Brett came back a few minutes later wheeling the bassinet into our room!

Since I still wasn’t able to sit up, Brett just held Joshua on the bed next to my head so I could see him. So precious.

The doctor came in and said that an early-morning blood draw (I guess one of the visits from the nurse was to draw blood!) revealed I had lost quite a bit of blood the day before and it seemed like the best course of action was to give me a blood transfusion.

(Actually, the first thing she said to me was that I was a “trooper” the night before since Joshua was such a big baby… which I took as an apology for thinking I wasn’t pushing hard enough and turning off the epidural.)

So they hooked up the first unit of blood (at this point, I had at least three IVs in each arm). Over the course of the morning, I tried to eat breakfast while lying flat on my back (unsuccessful) and a lactation consultant came to try and help me breastfeed while lying flat on my back (somewhat successful).

After each unit of blood (in total I was given three), I was able to sit up slightly more. By the early afternoon, I had finally eaten a meal (for the first time in over 24 hours) and was able to hold my baby.

Finally able to hold him!

We were discharged from the hospital the next day. It wasn’t exactly how I had pictured my labor and delivery (is it ever how anyone pictures it??) and I’m still not sure why my body reacted so strangely, but I’d say it was worth it.

Here are photos of some of our visitors in the hospital:

Joshua William Wendle

Sunday, October 7, 2012

9:26pm

9lbs, 14oz.

22”

Photo credit: Heather McKittrick

joshua's birth story: part two

Click here to read Part One.

Same disclaimer as last time, but here's a different video to watch instead. This one is of Joshua.

After an uneventful ride to the hospital, we arrived around 9:00am and were taken straight to a room. One of the best things about the hospital where I delivered is that you are in one room for your whole stay – labor, delivery (unless it’s a C-Section), recovery, and post-partum. Also, this wing of the hospital was just built (I think it opened less than a year before I had Joshua) so the rooms were beautiful and HUGE. We probably could have fit 15 people in there… not that I ever would have wanted that many people there, but it was nice to have the option, I guess.

My first nurse was wonderful – really sweet, very calm and helpful. I wish I could remember her name! I got into a gown and she asked me about a million questions. She was so nice, though, that I wasn’t even annoyed. She said we just needed to get some information and take my vitals, and then they would send me to walk the halls. I was so glad to hear that, since I was hoping to spend a lot of my labor out of the bed – I knew that walking would help my labor progress and I knew that as my contractions got worse I would want to be in different positions to manage them. I was going to try my hardest to avoid an epidural or pain medication. (Everyone says that, right?)

When the nurse took my blood pressure, the reading came back pretty high. I can’t remember the exact numbers, but it was HIGH. My blood pressure was almost perfect throughout my whole pregnancy (seriously, 120/80 at almost every reading) and never even approached the high range, so this was pretty weird.

After a long time of re-checking my blood pressure every 5-10 minutes and taking a urine sample, they diagnosed me with pre-eclampsia. 

Boo. With that diagnosis, many of my “plans” for labor and delivery went out the window. I would have to be hooked up to an IV in bed, which meant no walking the halls or managing contractions through movement. I would likely be given Pitocin and my doctor wanted to break my water to speed up the labor, which meant contractions would be AWFUL. (Pre-eclampsia isn’t too dangerous, provided it doesn’t turn into Eclampsia. So the doctors typically just want the baby out FAST in this case.) And I would be given Magnesium, which just all around makes you feel like crap.

But the ultimate goal, of course, was a healthy baby and a healthy mommy. So when plans have to get thrown out the window in order for that to happen, it’s an easy decision.

Things are kind of blurry in my memory after this point (I can probably blame the Magnesium for that). But after I got hooked up to the Pitocin and Magnesium, the doctor broke my water. I tried to tough it out for a little while, but ended up asking for the epidural. (Seriously, that Anesthesiologist was like an angel). This was around 2:00pm.

The epidural did bring some relief, except I had to keep shifting sides. (You’re not allowed to lie flat on your back with the epidural-you know, because of the massive needle in your spine-so the medicine seemed to kind of favor one side of my body.) I think we tried to watch a little TV (the first season of The West Wing, for anyone wondering), but I couldn’t focus much.

At 6:00pm the nurse said I was fully dilated and ready to push. She was going to call the doctor and we could get started. I remember one of the nurses saying that their goal for a first-time mom’s labor was about one hour of pushing. I couldn’t believe they thought that was encouraging… one whole hour?? I’ll collapse by then!

So I pushed. And pushed. And pushed. The doctor kept telling me that I needed to push harder, since they weren’t seeing much movement. I wanted to kick her, but I didn’t. I pushed some more. She assumed I wasn’t pushing hard enough since I wasn’t able to feel the contractions with the epidural. They turned off the epidural. I, again, kept from kicking anyone. I kept pushing. I cried. I told Brett I was never going to do this again. I think I threw up once or twice. But kept pushing.

Finally, at 9:26pm Joshua William Wendle was born.

Click here to read Part Three.

baby pool

Last week, Joshua decided to transition to one nap a day. (He also decided to start weaning and push a few teeth through so, needless to say, last week was not my favorite). While I think I'll enjoy the change overall (see previous post on naptime jail), the initial transition is a bit of a challenge. Not only are there larger chunks of time during the day to keep Joshua entertained, but since he's still used to napping in the morning, he can get pretty cranky leading up to his nap.

In a moment of desperation and to save my sanity, I forked over $11 for a small baby pool.

And it has worked wonders.

While it hasn't been super helpful for the mornings (it's pretty sunny back there in the morning), the deck is nice and shaded in the afternoons. So after his nap we can head out there for a little while. It's small enough for him to crawl in and out of, so he's entertained for quite a while. He'll splash around in there for a few minutes.

Then he'll throw a toy onto the deck and crawl out to retrieve it.

Then he'll spot some chickens and get excited.

Repeat.

Yesterday, we were out there for 45 minutes before he started to get bored... which, in the life of a 13-month-old, is an eternity. 

I just wish I had gotten one big enough for me to sit in...

on breaking out of nap time jail

Even though Joshua is too young to really play with another child, we go on a lot of "play dates". I'm sure many other moms agree - they are how I keep my sanity most days. I can have a conversation with another adult (albeit interrupted), I'm forced to put on non-pajamas and get out of the house, Joshua gets some interaction with people that aren't me (my extroverted little baby gets bored with just me all day), and being outside helps avoid the "I live in a beautiful climate but I prefer my air-conditioned little house" guilt.

It is so easy to get locked into what I like to call "nap time jail". Don't get me wrong - I LOVE nap time. It is another way I keep my sanity most days... even just the measly two and a half hours (total!) each day where Joshua is safe, in another room, and not demanding every ounce of my attention (and patience) can be sanity-saving. Nap time is when I can re-charge: I can take a shower, spend some time in the Word, catch up on email, take care of the dishes that are mocking me every time I walk past the kitchen, or (on particularly stressful days) take a nap myself. Thank you, Lord, for nap time.

But it is so easy to feel trapped in my house because I need to so carefully protect that time. It happens like this: I don't even try to run errands before his morning nap, so it's already after 10:30am. I need to run to the grocery store, but don't want to go right before lunch with a hungry/cranky baby. But I don't want to go between lunch and nap time with a tired/cranky baby. So I wait until the afternoon. Then I have to squeeze the errand in between nursing, end-of-school-day traffic, and dinner-making (since an early bedtime for baby makes for a pretty early dinner-time for the family)... making sure to pack a diaper bag, snacks and water for Joshua (snacks are the key to an almost-tantrum-free grocery store experience), making sure both of us have outside-world appropriate clothes on, and trying to wrangle a wiggly toddler into a carseat... A lot of times it's just easier to stay home. 

But the days that I do venture out and meet with a friend... are so worth it.

Watching Joshua (kind of) interact with another baby... relating to another human being about things that seem trivial but are actually pretty significant in my daily life (cloth diaper laundry detergent)... even just not-talking because we're chasing around our kids with another person is refreshing.

Remembering that while these at-home-with-young-kids days may feel messy, and mundane, and sometimes maddening... God doesn't require me to do it alone! Not only does He provide the wisdom, strength, and patience I need each day, He has placed me in community with other women who can relate to the struggles, joys, and exhaustion of this season.

Thank you, Lord, for play dates.

*All photos in this post were taken by the wonderfully talented, Nicole Eastman. Thanks, Nicole, for letting me share them!*

a few of joshua's new tricks

Just a quick post with two videos of Joshua...

Here he is being hilarious, wearing sunglasses and learning to give a "high five".

And here he is showing off his crawling-up-the-stairs skills. While you watch, I'll be buying every baby gate I can find on island.

P.S. The video cuts off at the end but rest assured, he didn't fall. :)

photo tour: joshua's room

One of my main priorities (which, admittedly, doesn't get much attention since the higher priorities include caring for an almost-toddler and trying to keep him from destroying the house) is working on making this house feel more like our home. Since many (all?) of the rentals in Cayman come fully furnished - even down to the linens, dishes, and artwork on the walls - it can easily feel like we're just borrowing someone else's home. And it's almost impossible to feel really settled in a place where your home doesn't feel like yours, you know?

I mean, even simple things like blenders. Maybe you got married a few years ago and got to create a wedding registry (woo!), so you picked out the exact blender you wanted. Maybe you even got into a fight with your fiance about it in the small appliances section of Bed, Bath, & Beyond. Maybe. You spent three wonderful years with your wonderful blender... just to pack it into a storage unit and move away. And now you're using someone else's blender - that they picked out for their rental home, so, you know, it's probably not their favorite blender. Ugh. Anyway, this post isn't about blenders.

So, in an effort to make this place home-y (not homely), I've been slowly working my way around the house and making it feel more like ours. There are lots of things I can't change about this place that I wish I could (for example: the color of our kitchen cabinets, the couch that sheds leather flakes (I didn't even know that was a thing!), and the weird bumpy carpet) but by making little changes, this place is starting to feel like our home. I've been moving around furniture, taking artwork off the walls, putting up (the very few) pictures and artwork we brought from Kenosha, etc.

The first room that has really come together is Joshua's room. I think it's probably because I had fewer options in there since it was already furnished with two twin beds and two dressers.

Here's a "before" picture from the day we moved in, standing in the doorway. (The other dresser is out of view here. You can see on the right side of the picture that the there's a "nook" in the wall. The wall does the same thing on the other side, and the dresser is in the nook to the left of the frame).

And here's an "after" shot of the same view... Joshua's playing in the crib since it was the only way I could keep him from crawling directly to his doom the stairs (we really need to figure out a baby gate for up here).

We shipped Joshua's crib from the US, so we had to make room for it. We ended up bunking the two twin beds against the wall next to the doorway and moving one of the dressers (it's currently in the upstairs hall closet, but we have plans to move it to the guest room).

Joshua loves throwing Hootie out of the crib and then peering over the side at him. This is often the exact position we find him (and Hootie) in when we go to get him in the morning or from a nap.

I stumbled across this map online while I was pregnant and LOVED it. I gushed about it on Facebook, and it showed up on our doorstep from some thoughtful friends a few weeks later!

Seriously, isn't it adorable??

I think the biggest obstacle in this room was figuring out a way to hang light-blocking curtains above the half-moon window. Since the ceiling slants toward the top (wait, is it called a vaulted ceiling? I don't know...) we couldn't hang the curtains to be both wide enough and tall enough. And we couldn't drill anything into the wall to hang the curtain rods. Ugh. So we ended up getting some of those huge 3M On-Command hooks that stick on the wall with adhesive, and you can see that the curtain hangs just barely below the top of the half-moon window. Good enough!

Here's a shot of wall opposite the crib.

The shelf was already on the wall, so that made this part a lot easier. I hung a banner from our Going Away/Joshua's Birthday party in Kenosha before we moved, and framed some "artwork" (I feel like a fraud calling it that) I made on the computer.

The print on the right is of Psalm 1:1-2, which was our "dedication verse" for Joshua. The one on the left has his "stats" from birth.

Overall, I'm pretty pleased with the way his room is turning out. It's all about working with what we've got here, so even though there are some ugly bunk beds on the other wall that we don't even use, there are little pieces of "us" in here, too. Things that not only are more our style, but also remind us of friends and family in the US. 

Annnnd, I'll leave you with a glamor shot of his crib. Because I just love, love, love his crib and I'm so glad we brought it. It almost makes up for the blender... almost.